I think that sex is on my mind and my tongue so much is because that way I don’t have to think about dying. When I’m somewhere wonderful or do something amazing and think “wow, if I was having sex now then this would be so much better”, I am at least not thinking “wow, I could be dead now and this wouldn’t actually be happening at all”. 

  I don’t actually have lots of sex and go with lots of women. I know reading all of this may lead you to think otherwise, but it’s the truth. I invented a relationship with a woman and kept up the charade for a few years just so that I wouldn’t have to awkwardly answer any awkward questions. I did put my penis inside a woman once, but it was all bloody when I took it out so I told her she had to leave. That event and my mother have put up quite a barricade in my path to a fully functioning sexual relationship. 

  Another very good reason that I don’t pursue sexual relationships, aside from all the fears and insecurities and anxieties and all that kind of the stuff, is I want to practise for when I am old and alone.