“The thing most disgusting to emerge from the recent London riots has been the country’s reaction. I am worryingly always worried when some kind of response or answer to the toils and drags of everyday life is offered by whatever group of people in whatever way – because the state, and all of its dicks, can never resist a rejoinder. Everybody likes the last laugh. Unsurprisingly, they are all more or less on the same lines. If there is anyone who has an actual stance on the issue, they are surely revolted by the drool pouring out of both sides of the country’s soft, gummy mouth.

  “On the one hand, yes, the conditions of life for most people has dropped dramatically and no child is brought to believe that its their fault, however much it might look the opposite. But that is no excuse for burning, looting and rioting. What’s more, we can safely presume that these children and their reckless, childish behaviour, did not have any real, well articulated socio economic grievances in mind when participating. And given that there were people in the same position who did not act as such, all rioters can be held fully morally responsible on an objective basis for their subject crimes.”

This is what I have seen from most of the press I cared to read, and most of the people who have opinions they want everyone else to hear.

The media has also done a great deal of belittling and joking at the rioters’ expense. Just listen to that stupid girl talking about ‘all the rich people’, she doesn’t know what she’s on about. ‘Copy cats’, ‘opportunist thugs’ and so on. It’s playground jargon kept brief for all of our fragile minds, only if people looked a little closer it would be obvious that these riots are special and will mark a turning point in our history. For those that expect society to get a lot worse for a while, before a pathetic governmental revival hidden under a lame lefty banner, you wont be disappointed. We don’t like surprises. However, this is all very unique in the following ways.

This is the first non completely race orientated, undefined and spontaneous three day uprising to occur in England in (as far as I can make out) since the Peasants revolt of 1381 (one of the main leaders was actually called Jack Straw). This is still considered a riot. Back to post 1950’s England, and all riots have occurred either due to racial tension between civilians, because of particular political movements (poll tax etc), or because of familiar social circumstances and police tension with one ethnic group. The most famous of those have been in Brixton and St Pauls, England’s two most infamous black sheep, who have rioted with passion on several occasions over the past thirty odd years. But 2011 appears to be the first time that so many people, so young, have done such a vigorous job of destroying the communities around them. This has occurred of course because of the catalogue of taxes, mostly aimed at children, that have been implemented to save us all in the long run in a way that most of us just don’t understand. I don’t, and I am on the side of those that refuse to just trust ‘those who know’ with fixing apparently imaginary problems that always seem to have severe consequences. Since we are dealing with children here and are trying to explain the out of order behaviour of a few, I think its easy to see that the ‘cut backs’ made to almost every essential area of life would make a teenager wonder what it is that they did wrong. These children are at least not fooled by politics. They at least don’t see the torrents of cases about criminal police, criminal government, criminal economy, and criminal warfare (given by a criminal press) as an example of our justice rolling over in its sleep once again, and prevailing. They are not so stupid as to see these as isolated revelations, but reflections of the true life in Britain. Its because of all these things that they have no reason to give a fuck.

Following the Brixton riots of 1981, Lord Scarman made a detailed review of the social conditions endured in black communities throughout London and the other areas were copy cats had followed suit (Toxteth, Chapeltown). The report found that people were living in unacceptable conditions, and relations between the people and the state had fallen into the hands of a racist police force, who were abusing the ‘sus’ laws introduced a few years prior; these have been rebranded as ‘stop and search’ laws. Though he refused to use the term ‘institutional racism’, the laws were reviewed and plans were made to deal with the obvious cause of the unrest. Though the carnage was mostly untelevised and unphotographed, several policeman and journalists were shot, and one was stabbed forty times and had his head almost hacked of with a machete (a copper not a journo). The killers were never caught, and the case only closed last year. Must have been hard to ignore. This time though, it has sprung from a much broader group. The Harehill riot of 2001 showed a similar thing, a multi racial group of youth fighting the police because of one too many injustices; London 2011 was twenty times the size

The ‘sus’ laws which Lord Scarman sought to diminish were created as a rebirth of a nineteenth century vagrancy act, in turn created so that police could search and arrest people on a hunch, instead of evidence. These were controversially brought back recently as the stop and search laws, along with a drastic reduction in police paper work, to make the jobs of our boys in blue easier and more effective. David Cameron made quite a deal of this in his manifesto, promising to do much more of the same. The Riot Act of 1714 is also still used (employed by Thatcher), defining 12 or more people in a group as arrestable for suspect intention to etc etc etc. Whether or not Cameron’s support has even made a change in the past few years, we would have to ask the boys living on the estates of London. I used to get pulled and questioned almost every night on my way back to my country estate just outside Bristol and it did make me wonder. In a land were jobs, money and all prospect is at a minimum, and where free market business (drugs, prostitution etc) gets you prison time, I would make a direct connection with rioting, looting and burning. I would take the opportunity to join in. Probably. And I probably wouldn’t have an excuse for you either, I just wouldn’t give a fuck by that point. Sometimes, prison cells don’t look too different from the council blocks. Ask Technique.

Nearly two thousand young people are now locked in cages at Her Majesty’s pleasure, all around the country. Very soon, the alert will be raised for ‘jails full’, a very serious problem for a nation like ours. There’s no need to repeat all the ridiculous things people have been given inexplicable amounts of time for, but the sentences are usually put down to crowd responsibility, which means, most of the time, you are held accountable for all of the things that went on in the area you were in at the time of arrest. Families have been given eviction notices due to their children’s actions and calls have been made to ‘shop’ your child in to the police. David Cameron’s response to the injustices was ‘lets be honest, I wasn’t there, you weren’t there, lets trust the courts with their decisions’. He might prefer ignorance now, but it was he who gave the magistrates permission to hand down sentences forty percent higher on average, and I suspect a certain amount of prison time/ defendant correlation was done, and we are now seeing a kind of series of show trials. You would think that ‘making an example’ would have nothing to do with real justice, but there we are.

All those that address the problems and wrongs our people are facing on a daily basis, simply in order to quash them, simply to observe the link and then brake it, are cowards the same as our politicians. Beware those that oppose the conditions and standards of our time, but then all at one support the Met. They are loose cannons, they are pointed at you from every angle, and they are  what could happen to a normal kid through private school. Harriet Harman spent a good ten minutes on Newsnight ranting about the troubles the blues and yellows have caused our people by the cuts, whilst refusing to make any connection whatsoever with the crimes that have now resulted. Partisan politics is what is probably dribbling through the mouths of your family and friends. Its a dichotomy for those sneaky cunts, who think that observation might do in place of attention. Riots aren’t planned in boardrooms, and the average thief doesn’t like massive fires going at the scene of the crime.

It was my mother that taught me that other people have feelings and do actually exist, and now I listen the news feed pouring from the tired excesses of her frontal lobes. We have a tendency to forget some basic values when a new task is at hand, particularly one that is complicated. Anyway, as long as our rioting veterans, and their brothers and sisters, do not grow up to have voices, which is now even less likely, British democracy can still thrive with peace and safety. These riots are original, ugly and profound. Police in New York are now spending millions on training forces for riot control out of fear, all five boroughs are on full alert. The world trembles at the feet of this rabble of chavs and, with the impending embarrassment of the Olympics looming, the government is going to get harsh. Raise the education standard, bring the bottles, bricks and fir extinguishers back to the Tory HQ, and get Cameron’s hands as dirty as possible, maybe if it gets bad enough people will actually want to clean up. Aye Hugh.”


My good friend, colleague, surrogate cousin and partner in crime (literally) Charlie Bucket has been pressing me very hard for quite some time now for me to allow him a guest post on the esoteric and cultish Br4infart. I have finally given in, because he won’t stop emailing and messaging me. It’s starting to interfere with my business. Hopefully this will satisfy him. Please don’t blame me for any drop in quality. 500 views. Suck me, beautiful.